How to deliver real pleasure to a man. Realization of sexual fantasies. Phillip Hodson, Ann Hooper

FOREWORD
For women, sex is different.
They just need to lie down.
Jackie Mason

This book is a love guide to the world of male sexuality for women who want to understand their partners and enjoy intimacy with them. At the beginning of the new millennium, the direction in which male sexuality is developing is still a matter of question and mystery. How to explain some of the contradictions? Here are a few examples from recent years:

♦ Screen star Hugh Grant is arrested in a car in the arms of a stranger, while one of the most attractive women in the world is supposedly waiting for him at home. Most women do not understand what prompted him to prefer the risky novelty of intimacy to a permanent partner.

♦ President Bill Clinton is infamous and nearly impeached for trying to have a superficial orgasm in the hallway with an employee. Many are perplexed: is fellatio worth risking the most enviable post in the world for it?

♦ Rock singer Mick Jagger, who should be babysitting his grandchildren, displays Casanova's prowess in the bedrooms of several actresses and models fit for his daughter. Some observers wonder: maybe he suffers from a mental illness, like an obsessive addiction to sex? Others say: it's all about the endocrine disease!

NOVELTY AND CONFIDENCE
Or take some cases of sexual orientation disorder in men. Today, in every major country in the West—England, France, Germany, Italy, and the United States—there is a small army of transsexuals and transvestites who prostitute and cater to supposedly heterosexual men. Doesn't this in some way testify to the sexual desires and fears inherent in men? Isn't it the fact that men essentially want the paradoxical - "a male mind in a female body" from women? Doesn't this mean that men need a prize cup of novelty tied with a ribbon of emotional security?

If this is indeed the case, then extraordinary abilities of understanding are required from women. But don't be discouraged from the start. Use this book skillfully and conscientiously—regardless of all the follies men, the fullness of spiritual and sexual harmony is still achievable. Before turning to ways to achieve more complete sexual satisfaction, deeply understand the following facts:

♦ Two-thirds of all marriages last a lifetime.

♦ As men and women age, they begin to look more alike. This is manifested even in physical resemblance: over the years, facial features in men become softer, and in women harder.

♦ Men's sex drive is not like a dinosaur's - it's controlled by the frontal brain - and they can choose when they want to be faithful.

♦ Men fall in love more easily and break up with love harder than women.

♦ When women manage to achieve the “right” sex with partners, relationships almost always develop successfully, so that you get the opportunity to control your common destiny.

However, if taken in general, men are more likely than women to operate in "emotional compartments." Although they have the same feelings, they face difficulties in determining them. The obvious result is that in order to control the male sexual imagination, women need to realize how different it is from their own. Here are some examples:

♦ Men would, on average, be more willing to have sex with a stranger than women.

♦ Men use pornography services more.

♦ Men worry more about their sexual viability than most women.

♦ Men take risks both to enhance their sex drive and to reinforce it.

♦ Men are, on average, more "perverted" and apparently less faithful.

Men are also aware that their largest sex organ is the brain. Another thing is that they secretly would like their brains to be in their pants. For centuries, men have been trained to lust after women who look young and attractive. So, if you want to keep love and sexual desire, you have to look deep into these male preferences. Men need the subtle currents of feminine influence to remind them that looks are just an attachment to sexuality, and sexuality is conditioned by what happens after words. Real love intimacy comes from feeling attached to another. to a person no less than from the excitement associated with touching a young flowering body. The poet Milton called beauty "the boast of nature" because it always fades. You need to help your man discover spiritual similarities and mental compatibility between you before his time runs out.

However, men are not beings from Mars. There is no point in treating them with silent contempt in the future. However, you need to accept the fact that a man prefers a slightly different erotic menu. Men are more likely to move from sex to love than from love to sex. Men do not trust so soon and open their souls at a greater cost. Men are sexually bifurcated: they understand that sex can be a means to achieve intimacy, but they believe that it is a very good goal in itself. As one of the female characters in the Woody Allen film says, "Sex without love is a waste of time." “Yes,” Allen replies, “but among all the empty pursuits, this is one of the best.” Such are men in almost any society. You need to work on this until the problem loses its urgency. Sometimes men just want to discharge - it's safe, because it's completely harmless. Will this make anyone feel bad? You need to understand that sex can be "such a simple thing."

And when you do, you need to revisit some of your own idealized fantasies. By accepting a man for who he is, you can hardly project onto him the same childhood dreams of a lifetime of romantic devotion. You can say to yourself, like Mrs. Serene Innocence, "He loves me, adores me, and utterly idolizes me." But he will certainly look at other women, imagining them in the nude. And at some point in the future, he might even consider getting into bed with one of them. Be prepared for this turn of events if you base your understanding on this knowledge. Because that's what men are.

Yet the key to maintaining any monogamous harmony is paying more attention to exploring your shared erotic addictions. If a man is fortunate enough to live with a woman who is re-mastering her love skills according to the man's age and stage of life—a proverbial whore in the bedroom but a good companion in the living room—he doesn't need to engage in the use of their ephemeral abilities on the side. Nature cannot be changed, but we are convinced that men can be tamed. And it is entirely in your hands.

Philip Hodson

1. MEN ARE NOT FROM MARS
There are no limits to the enjoyment you are capable of experiencing except your own imagination. But if this book offers the best of all possible sensual and sexual experiences that a woman can give a man, an erotic ideal, then how do you lead yourself to understand and create those circumstances that will make it possible in your home - for you and your partner? How to go from ideal to real? We start with the basic male psychology of Chapter 1 - there is no use in imagining that men are from Mars!

PEOPLE… FROM EARTH
No one nowadays believes that men and women are absolutely the same emotionally. John Gray's bestseller Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus put it quite clearly. Yet the two sexes are distinct, not opposed to each other. If you believe the exaggerations of writers like John Gray, then you will most likely have a much harder time getting good sex. You will never successfully reconcile your differences. Men and women are not alien species from different worlds. They are similar beings, trying to solve their problems from slightly different points of view. Here is what, in our opinion, John Gray is mistaken in psychology:

♦ Differences within gender are much greater than differences between genders. By this we mean that a man, just like a woman, has a wide range of desires, love and sexual manifestations, but that most men and women react in a similar way. Therefore, it is wrong to say that your loved one is on another planet and on another wave and is not able to "speak your language." There will always be important points of contact that are easy to achieve if you are aware of it and understand how to do it.

♦ Most psychological surveys show that there are no significant differences between the sexes. But these polls are not published because they have "nothing to report." Similar features are numerous. The physiological model of sexual reactions is identical, and hormonal systems, despite the unequal ratios of sex hormones function in a similar way. The resulting sexual problems in physiological terms do not differ much. Men suffer from impotence. Women suffer the same.

In other words: "People are from Earth."

It may seem strange to study the remaining differences after that. However, knowing when men and women are likely to see things differently becomes useful when you tailor your own behavior to suit your man. Significant sex differences are the subject of this chapter. First, we'll look at where men's sexual emotions don't quite match up with yours.

PSYCHOSEXUAL DIFFERENCES
The mind of a man works a little differently than the mind of a woman, his emotional radar is less sensitive. Therefore, men often tend to be guided by the idea that girls are the same guys, only they have breasts. If women are able to be generous to the physical defects of men, and disappoint them in men mainly