the same for everyone, and you demand good deeds from him, because by default you yourself do the same.

In addition, the cub needs to be made clear about its place in the pack, the family, that is. While recognizing and respecting the individual in a child, it is still necessary to maintain one's adult status in relation to him. The child must know that you are responsible for him and therefore have the right tell him what to do. You must explain to the heir why it is necessary to do one way or another, but bargaining with a child about this is unacceptable. The child must learn that there are consequences for disobedience, so that in time he will learn responsibility for his actions.

There are things that cannot be ignored. Not punishing a child for his misdeeds is the easiest way, but this will confirm the permissibility of such behavior. Unambiguous taboos include dubious jokes as an attempt (quite possibly unconscious) to humiliate a parent in order to test the boundaries of what is permitted. Not punishing jokes like: “If you don’t take me to the zoo, you will stand in the corner” means allowing the child to behave like this in the future. The same goes for boldness. The parent should always have the last word. Not in terms of swearing, of course, but the child should not get the impression that you retreated before his insolence. Otherwise, relapses are inevitable. The demand for constant attention and such petty blackmail should also be nipped in the bud. The child must clearly understand that no one will bargain and negotiate with him. They treat him with respect and explain what's what, but nothing more.

Ты же не хочешь оказаться в ситуации тех семей, жизнь которых крутится вокруг пожеланий child. I think I've seen these. It is very easy for parents who are soft and unsure of their own rightness to learn to control with the help of tantrums. Don't let it.

Learn to make friends with peers
Parents are, of course, good, but not enough for the full development of the cub. Everyone, including your child, needs friends. Children are usually quicker than adults to establish contacts with each other, but it may be that the child will need your help.
Toddlers begin to be actively interested in their peers closer to two years. Until that time, it is quite enough for them to communicate with their parents, whose task is to prepare their own child for the upcoming close friendships. To teach the child that interpersonal communication involves a humane attitude towards other people, honesty, respect, excludes meanness and betrayal. You also need to be able to make friends.

The first step to normal human friendship is acquaintance. This is usually not difficult for children - they are impulsive and spontaneous in their actions: “Hi. My name is Dima. Let's play," that's the whole ceremony. However, it may happen that your baby is shy, then he will need to be lightly pushed, taught to take the initiative. This is best done in a playful way. Arm yourself with patience and character toys (because "Hi, I'm Pyramid" sounds a little strange) and play with the child in new acquaintances. Take turns "come" to visit each other and arrange the ritual of the first meeting. You can do something like: “I'm a badger” - “And I'm a BARbie. I see we have a lot in common…” This is something of mine, apparently. However, you understand the course of action.

Aerobatics

You can’t force a child to make acquaintances by pushing in the back - no one has yet achieved anything from indecisive people, except for quiet hatred, of course. If a child is shy, and he is also ashamed of it, he will begin to be shy even more and, remembering that the guys saw all this, he will not be able to make friends with them for even longer. Carefully and gradually, illustrating with your own example, introduce the cub into the world of other people. You can also try to practice regular joint walks with some colleague father, it’s very good if there is one among your friends - you will have something to do.

Children who have siblings (siblings, scientifically, wow!) usually find common ground with other young people faster and easier. If you have a first child and he does not yet have experience of close communication with people of his age, it is quite possible that he will need folders to help him build public relations. To do this, on a walk in the park or playground, do not hesitate to serve the ball to the neighbor's kid or play cars with him. In order to “show on your fingers”, get to know the guys from the sandbox yourself and don’t be too lazy to build them a royal cake. Your child will understand that it’s not scary to get acquainted, and next time he will do everything himself.

If the contact is already established and the children play together, quarrels over toys are already close. The main thing in such a situation is not to take on the role of King Solomon and not to come up with different ways of dividing toys. Your task is to teach children to cooperate: in the world of a market economy, conflict resolution skills will come in handy for a cub. If you notice that a fight is brewing for some dump truck, take matters into your own hands. It goes something like this: “Guys! - you yell. - Can't you see the tire is flat? Yes, Mitya you are a mechanic. Vovka, you are the driver. Help push the car into the garage…” and let them start the repairs together. The main thing is to throw in the idea of ​​the plot of a new game, the details of the kids will come up with it themselves.

If the children still got into a fight, in no case should you punish them physically - in this way you will only confirm that all problems are solved with fists. After all, it is you who sets the pattern of behavior that children imitate. Better have a calm conversation about why fighting is bad. Already spend calories on eloquence, they will not be lost in vain.

How to respond to aggression
God's dandelions people are getting closer to old age. And that's not all. Moreover, total whiteness and fluffiness should not be expected from a young child. A child, just learning the rules of behavior in the mortal world, probes all possible behavioral options and reinforces the most effective ones. It's up to you to decide which ones to let work.

At the age of two, when children begin to learn to play together with their peers, they will definitely begin to fight for toys. And also spitting, biting, throwing sand and pebbles at each other, and something else that I don’t have enough imagination for now due to the considerable chronological remoteness from the described age period. Behavior of this kind needs to be stopped by you, and not by the neighbor boy, whom the father will eventually teach to fight back, so that the cub understands that anger needs to be controlled, and aggressive behavior does not lead to the desired result.

Good to know

Remember, the father does not yell like a half-cut, it does not add to his authority. The father says what he is punishing his child for, calmly and with complete confidence in the correctness of his act.

Here the saying “wedge by wedge” fails - you can’t wean a child from handing out slaps with slaps on the back of the head. By doing this, you will only wean the child from using physical methods of persuasion in your presence. However, the fact that you yourself do not disdain such methods of finding a common denominator will only convince him of the correctness of this approach - "dad does the same." You need to act smarter. At first, you will have to follow the game of your own child and his company in the sandbox. At that moment, when you notice that the decision has been made, and the hand has already been raised to strike, you intercept it (this same hand) and, Looking seriously into your eyes, you very calmly say: “No. You can't do that." You will have to repeat for a long time, tediously, monotonously. Over time, you will realize that the effort was worth it.

It may happen that the child was not followed up in time and aggressive behavior has already borne fruit - the children retreated several times before the “bite” argument from your child. Then you will have to act tougher - pick up the child and leave him to play alone, explaining for what such merits he is deprived of the company of his colleagues in the sandbox.

An excellent prevention of the aggressive behavior of children who have not yet fully learned to control their own emotions are active games - catching up, snowballs, some kind of football, possible at this age. In addition, the optimism of parents greatly contributes to the assimilation by children of the correct reactions to failures, which are expressed not by irritation and aggression, but by self-irony and a sense of humor.

In addition to direct aggression, that is, physical, there is also verbal. Mat that is. Well, not only mat, of course, abusive words in general. This is also a problem. Let's try to decide.

Let's be realistic - sooner or later the child will still learn about profanity. This is good - any knowledge is